Mentoring Children Yayy or Nay?

At some point in my life was instilled me the desire to see nothing valuable; not to make any efforts towards anything. For those of you who know me too well, giving-up has never been my option. I might take a break because I am consumed by other priorities, but I don’t leave it. In my life, and not unique to me, I have faced several life challenges. In those moments of despair, I would wish so much that my grand-mother was alive for me to go live in her hut and do nothing but join her in the farm and sing all day, while she did most of the work. That life was in my view, a stress free life. Grandma’s life was pretty basic. She did not need much and her greatest joy was to see the seeds she sowed produce bounties. She enjoyed sharing whatever she harvested and selling some to gain some financial remuneration which she used to purchase basic needs. I thought the life was stress free, but it wasn’t. She did stain as she tilled the soil, planted seeds, nurtured them and also harvested. Nothing in life is gloss. And even the beautiful roses that bloom in summer, do have their thorns. When we are little, our dreams are usually very void of the hurdles encountered in adult life. And as I transformed from being a child to being an adult, I think I was less prepared for the initiation into adulthood on several levels, but for the religious part of it. I think many people would agree to the adage that nothing prepares you for adulthood. I am here sitting in the quiet of the morning saying to myself, this is so untrue. As we go to school to learn the sciences to better prepare us to become engineers or experts in the specific routes we steer our wheels to, so too, can we be prepared for adulthood. Somewhere in me, I believe that since our world is a constructed world, it is possible to teach either us or our children how to permeate and navigate the constructed world whilst leaving them with the ultimate decision to either take what they are taught or discard it. As a parent, you are a coach. I do not see how else I can best phrase it. I am beginning to think that if I succeed in coaching the little ones what life is composed of and how they can skip, trod, hop, and run through the different miles, only then, will I think of myself as an accomplished parent. Only then will I say to myself, I tried my best, but the ball was in your hands, child. The crucial question is what do I teach? I have an idea. First, is to place a hurdle before they get to eat the finest things they ask for like simple chocolates. You want a chocolate, let’s see whether you can get it by spelling a word. By tidying up. I am not sure if this an apt challenge. But I have to see what works. 

Some authors like Christine Field expound on several ways coaching can be achieved. 

1) Home skills..help them partake in chores at home by assigning them to join you do things. Tidy up their areas and sorting out the laundry are examples.

2)Social skills Learning manners and etiquette in the relaxed atmosphere of the home can be fun! Play restaurant or tea party and challenge your kids to use their best manners. Talk about the underlying issue of respect and why we should do things such as open doors for others.

Use family rules, which should be determined during a family meeting. This list of rules—and the consequences for their violation—can be posted as a reminder to children. Together with learning responsibility and consequences, etiquette will make your child both personable and employable.

2)Social Skills. Children need to learn the basic concepts of time, such as reading a calendar and a clock, but they also need to learn discernment in the use of their time. Model wise use of time by managing your own commitments and schedule. The best use of time is that which provides stimulation and education, but has a primary commitment to growing and maintaining relationships with others

3)Life Navigation skillsParents must also teach their children to navigate the dangers of life by making sure they have drawn firm boundaries. Teach young children personal information, such as addresses and phone numbers, but also teach them when it is not appropriate to share this personal information, such as with a stranger.

4)Time Organisation Skills

5)Money Management

6)Space organisation

7)Spiritual Habits

8)Mental Aptitude

9) Creativity

10) Value of Life

see http://www.tparents.org/Library/Unification/Talks/Field/Field_children.htm

Do you have any ideas as to how we can prepare the little ones to be better equipped for adulthood? Please share.